Unrelenting Guilt
by Eimin - The Eternal Sleep
Summary: The scene in New Moon from Jasper's perspective and the guilt he feels afterwards when his family is forced away because of his actions. Rated T for blood. Sorry about the rubbish summary. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1!**

**Unsurprisingly, this is a Jasper story. I know I am supposed to be writing Caramel Petals but I couldn't resist writing the papercut scene from New Moon from Jasper's perspective. Hope you enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own twilight... I'm not Stephanie Meyer... Sob!**

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Bella's birthday party began so well...

Our home was a flurry of exited movement as my family moved the furniture effortlessly to create space for a large cream table - covered with a lacy material - which they placed carefully into the centre of the room. On the table were several presents, carefully wrapped in identical silver paper. I watched the colourful rainbows of light ricochet off the presents in tightly coiled springs, hitting the walls and spiralling through the window.

My family arranged themselves into a natural looking human gathering, - suitable for a party - imitating our almost-flawless facade. This was unnecessary - of course - as Bella was perfectly aware of the despicable creatures that we were. Regardless, Carlisle still thought it to be a good idea; it was all practice in his eyes. The other reason was obvious. He was vehemently against the idea of scaring Bella when Edward had been so isolated and alone before he met Bella. Even I could recognise the change in my recently acquired brother. I contemplated how much more noticeable the transformation would be to Carlisle; the person who had known him the longest.

Alice's fingers wrapped lightly around my wrist, severing my thought pattern. "They're almost here," she whispered fluidly in my ear. I took a few precautionary steps backwards and leaned myself against a long ivory-coloured post that was several shades darker than my alabaster-pale skin.

The door opened with a muted _creak _and Edward walked in, followed closely by Bella, who looked incredibly nervous.

"Happy birthday, Bella!" We chorused, our voices echoing together in the wide confines of the room. Bella smiled tentatively and examined Alice's pristine decorations. She glanced at the pink candles clustered on every available surface and grimaced at the many wicker baskets adorned with roses. I felt her mounting embarrassment as she looked down hurriedly, blood rushing to her cheeks. I shook my head from side to side quickly before the longing could isolate me in it's steely grasp. My angel lightly pressed my fingertips - a silent reminder to stay in control.

"Sorry Bella, we couldn't rein Alice in," Carlisle stage-whispered.

Bella was glancing uncertainly at Emmett and Rose now. I felt her tension - border lining on fear - as she glanced at my sister's cold, mask-like face. She relaxed a little when her gaze travelled to Emmett; his face was stretched into an enormous grin which abruptly turned to mock disappointment when he looked back at her.

"You haven't changed at all," - he shook his head, still feigning the disappointment - "I expected _a _perceptible difference, but her you are, red-faced just like always."

"Thanks a lot, Emmett," she whispered, staring at the floor. The colour in her cheeks deepened substantially. I bit down hard on my cheek to prevent the venom from welling in my mouth.

"I have to step out for a second" - Emmett paused to give a conspicuous wink to Alice - "Don't do anything funny while I'm gone."

"I'll try" Bella said sceptically.

Alice released my hand and skipped towards Bella, her white teeth sparkling in the bright glow of the lights. I smiled too but didn't move, not wanting to risk my already stretched self control. I sent a wave of calm towards Bella before her feelings got hurt. She scrutinised my face for a long moment, before she blinked and focused on Alice.

"Time to open presents!" Alice declared, excitement evident in her tone _and _in her emotions. She grasped Bella's elbow and towed her to the table overflowing with roses and shiny packages.

Bella attempted to look calm, "Alice, I know I told you I didn't want anything-"

"But I didn't listen," my beloved interrupted, smug, "Open it." She took the camera resting in Bella's hand and replaced it with one of the larger sparkling packages. I didn't have to move any closer to read that it was from Emmett, Rose and myself.

Bella weighed the box in her hands before tugging glittering paper from it. Confusion swept through her emotions as she stared at the box covered in small silver digits. She opened the box hoping for further illumination and peered into it, noticing that it was _completely _empty.

"Umm...thanks," she was uncertain. Rosalie smiled in spite of herself. I laughed.

"It's a stereo for your truck," I explained. "Emmett's installing it now so you can't return it."

Comprehension dawned on her face. "Thanks, Jasper, Rosalie," she grinned at us. "Thanks Emmett!" she shouted, forgetting that he could probably hear her at her usual volume.

Emmett's booming laugh echoed from the roadside and Bella laughed lightly in response.

"Open mine and Edward's next," Alice pressed, the excitement transforming her voice into a high trill.

Bella glared at Edward. "You promised," she accused. Before Edward could respond, Emmett bounded in.

"Just in time!" he crowed in anticipation, pushing past me to get a closer look.

"I didn't spend a dime," Edward reassured her, brushing a loose strand of hair from her face.

Bella turned to Alice, "Give it to me," she sighed, defeated. Emmett chuckled in front of me.

Bella took the package, holding it like it contained a time bomb, rolled her eyes at Edward and jerked her finger under the tape.

"Shoot," she muttered at something I couldn't see. She held up her hand to examine the minuscule cut on her finger.

I sucked in a breath in surprise. The scent spiralled down my mouth, causing the burn in my throat to flare sickeningly as the blood dropped a vivid scarlet blob from the cut. Then Jasper was gone. Everything I was working to be ceased to motivate me at that precise second. _I _was the predator. _She _was my prey. Like adding two and two together.

My subconscious vaguely registered a deafening roar of "_NO!" _but it was far too late. My prey had been thrown to the floor and more blood proceeded to pulse out of the gash in an unmerciful stream. I smashed hard into the vampire that _dared _to try and take my prey away from me. The sound was like a rock slide but I could scarcely hear it over the grisly snarling ricocheting in my chest.

I advanced quickly on the vampire who was crouched - unbreathing - over the weak human. A growl tore up his throat - directed at me. I pushed against him violently, trying to thrust him far enough away so that I could strike. I snapped my teeth inches from his face, attempting to force him backwards whilst my gaze remained - undeterred - on the human.

Another vampire grabbed me from behind and I jerked away instinctively. Surprisingly, my violent gesture did not allow me to escape and I continued to struggle fruitlessly. I swung my head around and snapped my venom laced teeth at the perpetrator. His grip did not yield in the slightest.

Through a thick fog of bloodlust, I felt a faint prick of fear eminating from the human. I focused my snarling face on her.

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**I'll put up chapter 2 as soon as I finish it. Please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Sorry for the long gap between chapter 1 and 2 of this story... I'm writing about 6 stories at the same time so updates are going a little slowly on all of them!**

**Thanks for reading and reviewing my stories everyone! It means a lot!**

**So without further ado, on with this chapter!**

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**Chapter 2: Escape**

Through my layers of instinct-driven blood lust, I heard someone speak in a quiet tone, ringing with authority.

"Emmett, Rose, get Jasper outside."

The powerful vampire who I was still struggling vehemently against began to move, his whole face turned down in a determined frown. He nodded slowly, "Come on Jasper," he insisted, giving a sharp, forceful tug on my arm. One thing was perfectly clear through the haze, he was_ trying _to take away my prey. I set my jaw, he _wouldn't _move me! I struggled more violently, twisting and writhing against the unbreakable bonds.

_No! _My subconscious screamed as I dug my feet into the pale floorboards, determined not to move an inch. I bared my teeth and growled sharply at the antagonists. A female moved in front of me - inches from my venom-laced fangs - and helped wrestle me through a door.

I was dragged - still thrashing pointlessly - into a lush forest with all the trees closely packed together, forming a kind of canopy over our heads. As the scent slowly escaped my feverish mind, I found myself again. The hectic memories of the last events crashed through my mind, slightly hazy due to the crazed stupor I had been encased in, the walls trapping me on all sides. I was a twisted and monstrous abhorrence. Sadistic! No better than the tracker we killed. A faint whine sounded in my chest.

The vampire - no - _Emmett_ took this as a signal that I had come to my senses. The restraining vices disappeared, to be replaced by his hands hovering over my shoulders as a precaution.

I dropped to my knees, feeling familiar waves of self-loathing creep into my system. I was disgusted at my obvious weakness. I could feel my siblings' uncertainty at my movements. Emmett's hands hovered uncertainly for another moment before he let them drop.

"Jasper?" he said my name nervously as if afraid that it would set me off again, "You okay?"

I shook my head wearily and sank to the ground. I rested my head on the cold, cracked earth and closed my eyes, allowing the fresh clean scent of pine needles to chase the dregs of the taboo scent away. I inhaled heavily and sighed.

When Rosalie spoke up, her tone was scathing, "I _told _them that this would happen. I told them this _had _to happen sooner or later."

"Rose!" Emmett chastised her. "This isn't the time," - I looked up as he gestured in my direction - "Show some tact."

I was slightly annoyed at that remark. I also found it exceedingly bizarre that _Emmett _was lecturing anyone else about _tact._

A thought drifted into my mind; _Alice!_I worried, scouring my brain for some inclination that I had harmed her. Although there was none, I still had to ask. "Alice-"

"Is still at the house," Emmett clarified for me, knowing precisely what I was asking, "she's fine, you didn't harm her."

I breathed a sigh of relief. "Bella?" I murmured.

"Carlisle's patching her up." Emmett paused at my look of horror. "I'm sure she'll be fine."

"Did I... bite her?" I choked out, struggling with the words.

"No."

"Thanks."

"No problem, bro."

His emotions were still tinged with uncharacteristic worry. I sent out a wave of calmness; we didn't _both _deserve to have our piece of mind ruined. He was, however, watching his brother rip himself apart whilst showing no signs of ever moving again. I could see why he was worried. I couldn't get the prick of fear emanating from Bella in the hazy memory out of me. It kept replaying in my head, like some sort of sadistic video stuck on 'loop'.

I curled myself up against an ancient oak tree. "It's all my fault..." I mumbled almost silently.

"No!" It was Rosalie that spoke this time, her emotions certain. "It's that pathetic human, Bella's, fault," she sneered at Bella's name.

"No!" I protested. "My fault..."

"It's nobody's fault!" Emmett spoke up before Rosalie could answer back. It was strange, him being the diplomat. "Chill out!"

Suddenly, we all heard a scuffling noise in the low set trees, I growled slightly, tensing myself against the possible threat. I pushed away from the tree and stood up in one abrupt movement. I stopped breathing and listened intently.

"Jasper?" An all too familiar voice rang out. "Where are you?"

I fell back against the tree. What the _hell_ could I say?! _"Sorry, for almost wiping out the reason for your existence"_? Even in my head, the words were inadequate. Sorry was a very inadequate word to use. I _knew _that if someone had been foolish enough to attempt to harm Alice, they would be in a smouldering pile by now. Courtesy of me.

Edward appeared through the trees, his eyes like a whole city burning.

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**Yay! Chapter finished!**

**Hope you liked! Review please! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**I'm glad you all like this story it is extremely nice to hear. Glad people think I write Jasper's POVs well too because he is my favorite character and I wouldn't want to ruin his character.**

**Edward is pretty angry in this chapter, perhaps a little OOC, I wouldn't know, I'm not overly confident when writing from Edward's POV. It adds a bit of action to the storyline at least.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Moon, or any of the Twilight Saga. If I did... it wouldn't be as good or as popular and would involve more Jasper and Alice. (Fave pairing) :)**

**Mood: Depressed**

**Listening to: 'Hypocrite' by Skye Sweetnam**

***Does peace sign and smiles* on with the story!**

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**Chapter 3: Accused and Protected**

Edward glared at me through the dense little trees as I felt tentatively for his emotions. They were confused. Anger, sadness and pain mixed. It _hurt_. It burned me and made me feel so shameful of my truly inexcusable behaviour.

_'I'm sorry Edward,' _my thoughts mumbled. I tried to inject as much remorse into those short two words as I possibly could_. 'So sorry..._'

Edward sighed heavily. I stared at him, my tortured brother, and wished he would just attack me. I could see the urge to do so thrumming through his veins like thick condensed blood. I watched the instinct to kill warring with the brotherly love he felt for me. I knew that him attacking me would be perfectly justifiable. I _felt _it coming; the snap. The turning point where he would lunge at me and attack like some instinct driven newborn. I waited for it, perfectly still and unmoving. I _expected _it. As I expected, I didn't have to wait long.

Edward moved with the blinding speed that was his greatest asset; excluding his mind reading ability. His elbow bashed my chin with impossible speed and I reeled backwards. I gritted my teeth and resisted the urge to sink my fangs into my brother's throat. I heard a hoarse yell from behind me and twisted around to shoot a warning glance at Emmett and Rosalie not to intervene. I could handle this. After all _I _deserved it, not them. They had managed to control _their _thirst.

My glance lasted just a fraction of a second too long. With my mind somewhere else, Edward took split-second advantage and dug his venom-laced fangs into my limp arm. I yelled out and used his grip against him to throw him to the forest floor. I believed in justice but I didn't want to _die_.

Edward hissed as he hit the ground with a resounding _thud _like a rock slide. The pressure left a tiny contour in the earth as he stood up gingerly. He growled, a menacing, guttural sound, to try and frighten me before he lashed out again like a toddler in a tantrum but much, much stronger.

Before his fist could connect with my stomach, a tiny inky black streak passed across my body, throwing him to the ground. "_ENOUGH!_" The figure screamed before running to stand in front of me, hands outstretched in a defensive position. It was Alice. Of course.

"No, Edward," Alice shook her head, her tone sombre. "Jasper didn't mean to..."

"I know," Edward spat through his teeth. "But he _nearly_ managed it. He nearly killed... He nearly k-killed _Bella._" A tremor shook his body. He was in a low hunting crouch facing Alice, his teeth bared.

_This is wrong..._

Alice glared at Edward, her jaw set in a stubborn line, her arms still outstretched.

_Wrong... _My thoughts screeched at me. _Alice is in the line of fire! This is _wrong_!_

I moved around my angel, pushing her tiny frame behind me. When she tried to protest, I wrapped my finger lightly around her wrist. "Please, stay behind me," I implored, turning towards Edward.

He emotions were confused, his brows furrowed. He was no longer angry, at least. When he spoke, his tone was shocked, "I'm sorry, Jazz. I know you didn't mean it... I just... I just..." He seemed unable to finish.

"'S okay," I said, attempting to smile. "It was my fault." The guilt overwhelmed me and I ran, choking on a sob. I could hear the others shouting to me and calling me back but I continued to run. I ended up in the room me and Alice shared where I curled up into a loose ball on the bed.

_All my fault..._

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**Sorry if you don't like this, I think it is okay, but not brilliant. Hopefully the next chapter will be better!**

**Good-bye! :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Moon, or any of the Twilight Saga. If I did... it wouldn't be as good or as popular and would involve more Jasper and Alice. (Fave pairing) :)**

**Yeah, forth chapter! I know! I'm shocked too! I'm really enjoying writing this story! It's fun!**

**Mood: Hyper (Is that a mood? Lol!)**

**Listening to: 'Supermissive Black Hole' by Muse**

**Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala!**

**On with the story! :)**

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**Chapter 4: Comforted**

I had not moved an inch. Not whilst Bella was bandaged. Not whilst Carlisle explained his story. Not even when Bella asked if I was okay and Alice replied that I felt weak. I tested those words in my head. _Weak, uncontrolled, pathetic and beast-like. _I shuddered. I was all the things I never intended to be. I did not deserve to be called part of the 'Cullen' family. Did not deserve to be within a hundred miles of any of them. Especially Alice. She was so sweet; so pure. I did not deserve her. The horrific images of the day kept flashing before my timeless eyes: Bella, fear undulating in thick waves from her as I prepared to attack. Edward with burning eyes - eyes beyond reason - launching himself at me. Alice - my Alice - putting her arms up to protect the terrifying creature that was me. Rosalie's smirk and Emmett's bizarre diplomatic actions...

The light _creak _of the oak door interrupted my thoughts of self-loathing. Then the soft patter of tiny feet across the floor quickly followed. I was still curled up in my loose fetal position facing the window and I sighed and closed my eyes. My angel deserved someone better than me...

"Jazzy?" An angel's soprano whispered. "You okay?"

I sighed again, my back still rigid, my mind still clouded with continuous self-loathing. _My fault... _My mind chanted without a pause. _All my fault..._

A hand, small and the same temperature as my own, fell softly onto my hand. I felt no need to pull away. _This _was a hand I could differentiate from millions of others. My True Love's hand. My Alice's. She traced small delicate patterns over my hand. Each tiny mark that each newborn had inflicted on my person formed small abstract patterns down my fingers and around my wrist which she flowed her fingers over, creating beautiful - yet invisible - paintings across my skin. I shivered and then sobbed brokenly.

"Shh..." Alice crooned softly. "Hush..."

I smiled slightly through the choking sobs and slowly pulled away from her hand, jerking myself into a sitting position with my shoulders slumped. I heard Alice crawl over to where I was slumped, defeated and I felt her angelic fingers tugging softly through my hair with a slow, rhythmic pace that never faltered in its tempo, like a beautiful harmony composed by the most talented musician.

I leaned into her hand and sighed, contented.

"It's really not your fault you know, Jazz," Alice smiled at me. "So _smile_!"

I tried. Alice grinned and laughed.

"Exactly. You okay?"

"Doesn't matter. Is Edward okay now? He should hate me!"

_"No!" _My love gasped, shocked. "He doesn't hate you! None of us do! We all realise that it's _not your fault! _So stop wallowing!" She looked at me sternly. "That's an _order, _Major Whitlock."

"Yes ma'am," I said, finally smiling.

Alice smiled angelically and reached upwards for my face. I leaned down obediently and pressed my lips to hers. I felt whole. Completed. Utterly contented at that moment and the reassuring part of my conscience spoke in a whisper, _'she would love me in any form...'_

_Why should she have to deal with this though? Why would she have to accept this? _The self-hating part of my mind screamed but it was quickly overruled by the completed fire in my veins.

**********

When we grudgingly parted, it was almost night-time. The last remaining speckles of light were sending light lilac streaks across the inky darkness of the sky.

"Come on," Alice whispered and beckoned for me to follow her.

"Why?" I enquired, hatred creeping its way back into my veins.

"A meeting. Downstairs."

A meeting? I shuddered.

"Don't be afraid, Jazz, no-one blames you."

"They should..." I whispered but followed Alice quickly from the room and down the stairs.

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**Sorry this chapter's a bit short!**

**I liked this one. I hoped you did too!**

**Buh-Bye!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Moon, or any of the Twilight Saga. If I did... it wouldn't be as good or as popular and would involve more Jasper and Alice. (Fave pairing) :)**

**Hello world! Lalalalalalalala! *Breaks glass* Whoops *nervous grimace* Sorry. Anyway, onto chapter 5: the meeting.**

**Thanks to: JasperAliceObsessor, Twilightlvrfreak (Thanks for the praise!), ZareenBlack, iamnotupsetwithjasper and Music of the wind, for reviewing this chapter, it means a lot!**

**Mood: Happy**

**Listening to: 'Thanks for the memories' by Fall Out Boys**

**On with the story!**

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**Chapter 5: The meeting**

The mood in the living room was that of a funeral. A grisly funeral for the closest of loved ones. In the pit of my stomach, the feelings of not belonging intensified; this predicament was caused by me. I was the reason we were all continuously avoiding Edward's eyes, afraid to see the agony in them, even for a second.

Edward read my mind with an impassive face, he seemed beyond caring what anyone thought now. His sharp ocher eyes did not seemed completely calm yet and I sensed in his emotions that he had not fully released the blame he felt needed to be placed on me. He was, however, restraining it behind tight vices, determined to put the unpleasant feelings into the back of his mind, to deal with later. _Later... _I pondered the ominous sound of that. And - in truth - it _was _ominous; to all of us, not inclusive to just me. None of us knew what tomorrow would bring. That was what we were here for: to decide what was to be done.

Carlisle cleared his throat and we all swiveled our necks in his direction, breaking from our reveries. He glanced at each of us in turn. "What happened yesterday..." He began. "_Was _dangerous, but not anyone's fault," - I snorted quietly and he shot me a painful, pleading look before continuing. "We are here to decide what is to be done..."

"Let us council," Emmett sniggered in a mock impression of the Volturi. Everyone glared at him - even Esme - and his face turned sober very quickly.

"Alice?"

Alice glared. "We do nothing," she stated, almost commanded with the tone her bell-like voice had adopted. "Bella already knew of the implications of being around vampires at the time of the incident. She accepted this as a part of her normal life. She'd be heartbroken if Edward left..." - a faint whine from Edward's direction at her words - "I vote we stay."

"We leave." Edward stated immediately and then appealed to Carlisle. "The danger is too high. We cannot allow this to happen again."

"She's just a _human_!" Rosalie moaned. "Why should we have to leave?! It's only a _hum-_"

"She's a bonded partner, Rose," Carlisle sighed. "Do _not _let me hear you speaking of her like that again."

"Fine," Rosalie huffed angrily, glaring at Carlisle.

"Edward dear, I have never seen you this happy before. Bella brings it out in you. I don't think I can watch you destroy yourself this way." Esme's soft voice was only a whisper, her emotions spiked solely with concern.

"We stay."

"We leave!"

"We go."

"We _don't!_"

I closed my eyes. Vampire's voices were always described with the same words. Musical. Bell-like. But when all the voices were arguing and _fighting, _then the voices crashed together like clashing notes, inharmonious and grating to the ears. They argued and overrode each other in painful spasms, heard especially clearly through vampire ears. The angry, violent emotions swirled in my head, forming a vehement mist that swirled painfully in my head, not allowing me to think, drowning me. For the first time in over a century, I felt sick. Truly nauseous, no illusion of the mind. I sighed and clutched the side of my head, speaking, trying to induce calm on their emotions.

"What if _I _leave?"

The silence that followed this question was profound. Everyone turned to look at me.

"No, we don't want you to leave," they all chorused unhappily.

"You all want to stay," I smiled unhappily. "You _should _stay. And to stop the dangers, I'll leave."

"No!" Alice hissed, then louder. "NO! Don't you _dare_!"

"Jasper," Esme murmured, depressed. "You are part of our family, we don't want you to leave..."

"She's just a human..." Rosalie growled again, confused this time.

Alice's hand closed around my wrist. "I'll change my vote," she whispered. "I cannot - will not - live with out Jasper in my life. If he goes, we _all_ go."

"Yes," Carlisle finally agreed. "Yes we should go..."

I felt wretched. I was driving my family out of their _home _now. It wasn't fair on them. Why should they have to be punished over _my _stupid mistake, my inability to cope with even the slightest speck of blood. Not even a paper cut.

"Who is voting to leave?" Carlisle asked softly.

Alice put her hand up. In her emotions, she felt she had no other option. Everyone but me put their hands up slowly too. Esme, nervously. Edward did it with a stone face that would not display emotion. In his emotions, he felt life was not worth living. The guilt crept up on me again, ready to swallow me.

"We leave," Carlisle said finally.

The guilt lunged and swallowed me.

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**thanks for everyone who PMed me to say they couldn't wait to see the next chapter, it means a lot.**

**Buh-bye!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Moon, or any of the Twilight Saga. If I did... it wouldn't be as good or as popular and would involve more Jasper and Alice. (Fave pairing) :)**

**Sorry for the long wait, I'm in the last week of being a year 10 before I begin my work experiance so I'm trying to get all my coursework finished in time. So sorry! Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews this story!**

**Mood: Worried**

**Listening to: 'All I've done' by Linkin' Park**

**On with the story.**

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**Chapter 6: A Clean Break**

Alice wanted to say goodbye. I could hear her discussing it with Edward downstairs. I already knew that he wouldn't consider it. His emotions were speaking volumes to me.

"It'll be a clean break, Alice. That way, the emotional scars will heal so much faster," he assured her.

"B-but we'll never see her again!" Alice protested. "I _need _a goodbye! I need to explain it!"

A thrumming noise. Edward tapping his foot on the floor, I was fairly sure. "Alice..." He complained.

"Please?"

"No. I'm sorry, Alice. You'll have to leave. I'll say goodbye for you if you want."

"Okay..." Alice sighed, resigned. Pain welled in my stomach at hearing my beloved's voice in such obvious agony. Bella was a best friend to Alice; something she'd never had the chance to experience and had no recollection of.

I stood up and padded downstairs to where the argument was being held. Edward and Alice stood a little further apart than was usual in an argument and both their postures were rigid and stubborn. Edward had his feet planted firmly into the ground and his head averted, whilst Alice had her arms crossed across her chest and a pleading expression on her face. Her expression was so desolate. It was torture to watch.

I moved, my feet making barely a whisper against the polished floor, to stand by Alice's side and put my arm lightly across her shoulders. She continued to glare at Edward was a split-second, and then - with a resigned sigh - allowed me to pull her gently away. Before the door shut, I shot Edward a pleading glance also, but he stuck his chin up at me and pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger. I sighed as I shut the door with a sharp _click_.

Alice clutched at my limp arm as I slumped against the wall. "He didn't mean that, Jazz. He didn't mean to glare at you." Her voice became more urgent in a millisecond, "he doesn't blame you, Jazz; none of us do."

I smiled slightly at her comforting words. It was in Alice's nature to comfort others and her emotions _did _make me feel happier. She felt that the words of comfort spilling out of her were truthful. She fully believed what she was saying. _She _did not blame _me _in the slightest. It eased my guilt an infinitesimal amount and made me smile; the first true smile I had given since that nightmarish incident.

But then I heard the door slam loudly as a whispered curse was uttered in Edward's tone of voice, directed at no-one. I sighed and rubbed my temples viciously, closing my eyes at the same moment. I attempted to move out of the front door. Alice's hand on my arm became a restraint, preventing me from following Edward to assess his emotional state.

"No, Jazz," Alice breathed in my ear. I ignored the warning and pulled myself to my feet. "Jasper, _look at me!_"

I grudgingly dropped my gaze to glance at her. Pain and worry for me was etched plainly on her features. "Let's pack now, Jazz. Then we can leave early and get everything set up." She smiled a little ruefully. "A clean break, just like Edward said, easier to heal."

I grasped her tiny hand in mine and walked up the stairs. The words _'A clean break' _echoed dismally in my head.

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**Like I said, sorry about the enormous wait. I'll update soon! Please read and review! :)**


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